Chris Wilkins

A fictional narrative of a non-fictional life.

Category Archives: Uncategorized

The Evil Dead!!! (with clay)

This is absolutely brilliant!

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Resistance 3

Yah, i just bought this. pretty damn excited to finish playing it.

Avenged Sevenfold Awesome Song

This reminds me of the nightmare before christmas until you watch the incredibly disturbing video.

Travesty City – Completely Hand-drawn movie

Travesty City – Full Animation from Ryan Fedyk on Vimeo.

Check this out. A very cool little piece of animation.

Restructure

the work area

It is time for me to rethink my blog. Right now it contains some random comments as well tech things and my creative writing. In preparation of my new website, I am going to be requesting submissions for new writings.

If you would like to submit a writing, send me an email at cwilkins88@gmail.com. I will look over it, and reply to your email if I am going to post it. I will then advertise you through twitter etc, so you can have some incentive for coming

Any Questions

Submit Your Writings

Fractured Scribe

DixonBaxi Shattered Glass

I will be creating a new website. This website will attempt to allow users to share and distribute writings of all sorts either publicly or privately. They will be able to log in via twitter or Facebook and post their favorites directly to their wall/timeline. They will also be able to vote this way. At the end of every way, the writing with the most votes, will become a featured writer.

This writer will get exposure through our website, which encourages good content, and will allow unknown writers to get their stuff out. At the end of every three months, we will collaborate every featured author and distribute their short stories along with some of the runner-ups through a digital e-book, emailing all those who wish to have it(as well as making it available online

To help speed this process along, please help us with suggestions for what features we should have, or try to avoid

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Fractured-Scribe/231134603579135

Chest on Fire

Fire

Anger and guilt plague my conscience. What do you do when the world is falling down around you like the leaves of a thousand trees. My orchard of tears fall as I contemplate the decisions that I have to make. I go to work, and spend the better majority of it regretting the return trip home, knowing that when I get there, i will once again deal with the problems that rot my soul. The tension growing deep inside of me swells my chest to the point of bursting. My chest ignites.

I drive into the night, with out the lack of lights or an ironic similarity, direction. I lose myself once again in a clarity of thoughts, until i round the corner and drift down the street where i reside. I open the door, and the thoughts of clarity and space and freedom vanish swiftly. I twist the knob and I die a little inside. I walk upstairs and retreat to my room. Every night i die in my darkness, my cave of thought and regret and anger. Now, my pity stains my clothes for ones who once were but never can be again. My knuckle splits and throbs with each keystroke of relief.

My conscious clears with my poetry of rhetoric. This is my therapy, my page of thoughts. My heart bleeds deeply for those who are gone, lost, to the avoidance of friendship, which I can only do my best to flee from. I apologize if i have wronged the pillars of my life. But to those who remain, …the few who remain. I appreciate everything. You are my smiles and my reason to try. My crutches. Finally, i will leave you with a verse from a song that i know, which can better describe me in simple paragraphs that i have exiled to this digital parchment. I banish them forever.

“And he tells everyone a story,
Cause he thinks his life is boring
And he fights so you won’t ignore him,
Cause that’s his biggest fear
And he cries, but you’ll rarely see him do it
And he loves but he’s scared to use it
So he hides behind the music
Cause he likes it that way
And he knows, he’s so much more than worthless
He needs to find the surface
Cause he’s starting to get nervous”

Shattered Dreams

Rainstorm Near Sossusvlei

Photo Courtesy of Rob Kroenert(Wiggum03) on Flickr.

Twice drenched today in his lonely world,
one by weather…the other by a girl.

A seamless collapse of reality presses him,
from a once perfect mindset.

She is the destroyer of worlds,
the destroyer of hearts.

But even with such fragility and shame,
he lives on with no regrets

For now he knows all about her,
and the volatility of romance

It can’t be controlled,
can’t be maintained.

It will hurt in a second,
kill with a glance

……And the only thing worth pursuing.

Five (non-academic) things I learned during college

1. If you live your life for other people, your life will suffer.

When I began college, I went out of my way to help every single person I came across, giving advice, running errands; I was even designated driver for an entire year for a group of my friends. This was all fine for a while, until I realized that I began to suffer in turn. My grades dropped, and my happiness lowered because of a lot of these things(combined). So take some advice, help your friends, but not to the point where it destroys you.

2. Don’t pass good things by.

Often things will happen, that you just let slip by, due to money problems, time constraints, etc. I passed by several concerts, trips to the city, and other things because I felt I had a financial lag behind others. It stopped me from enjoy a lot of things I wish I would have done. Do things you enjoy(to a certain extent).

3. Don’t take excessive loans

This seemed like a good idea. Don’t worry you say. I’ll make up for it, I’ll make up for it with work later, and pay back the loans anyway, but I just need the money now. Right? Wrong, you won’t, because you can’t, and even if you could, you wouldn’t, so only borrow what you absolutely need.

4. Get involved

A lot of the problems I have now are due to the fact that instead of getting involved with clubs, I worked two jobs, and neglected things I enjoyed. Join a club. MAKE the time, you’ll find it worth it in the end, and so will your employers.

5. Don’t follow others advice blindly

I stuck with a major for three and a half years; because I listened to what others told me would be a good career path for me. I suffered through programming and other classes I didn’t enjoy because I let others convince me it was best. It wasn’t until I switched majors, did I become happier, become more interested in my classes, and raised my grades because of it.

Summary: Live your life for you, because it’s the only one you got. Help others out along the way and listen to their advice, but in the end, you know what is best for you.

On Things

I am graduating this December, and find myself hopeless lost in thought about a number of different things. The obvious things are invading my thoughts constantly: actually graduating, taking my last classes, and of course, finding a job. However, these are not the only things.

Maybe I can shed some light:

Graduating:

The problem with everything isn’t the fact that I’m graduating. It’s that my GPA will not support the type of career I want, which is consulting. Three years of the engineering program destroyed my GPA to a measly 2.0. After another couple years, I am almost to a 3.0, but I am not sure it will be sufficient.

I am overly confident in my ability to actually perform the job, but my GPA will not land me an interview. I get other interviews, and I appreciate them, and may even like the job, but for now, I am disappointed that years of college will not result in my dream career(right now anyway).

Friends:

With graduation comes the loss of friends. Somehow, it seems no matter where i accept a job, I will lose incredibly close and good personal friends. This is not acceptable to me. I have always found that I make friends easily, but I do not make good friends easily, the kind that stick with you, that always have your back. I am at the point, where I know that anyone of my friends currently, would do anything for me at the drop of a hat, and I absolutely refuse to accept leaving any of them. All will be fixed with time, i suppose…

Personal Life:

How do I decide where to move when my girlfriend, has her heart set of Vet School. How can i accept a career, knowing that I could be holding her back. Its a tough decision, and I have to decide quickly for this.

There are some other things I would like to discuss, but maybe not over public forums. Maybe in a later post. Keep in touch. Always I plan on posting some more narratives. Check em out.